I saw The Last Witch Hunter last night, and it reminded me of how awesome Vin Diesel is.
First, a movie review of The Last Witch Hunter:
The Last Witch Hunter is a movie about Vin Diesel, a cursed immortal man, who keeps the peace between humans and witches by acting as a watch dog. I don’t want to give anything away, so I’ll just say that it’s a phenomenal movie.
I give it 8 FLAMING SWORDS.
And now, a review of Vin Diesel’s website:
I ventured over to Vin Diesel’s website and was thrilled to see a link for Vin Diesel’s JOURNAL. I was like, “He keeps an online journal. Like me. That’s something Vin Diesel and I have in common. We are one and the same inside.” So I clicked on the link to the Journal, and it’s just a picture of him. I’ve made this image a clickable link to his website, so you can confirm for yourself.
There are two logical explanations for this lack of content in his Journal section.
Explanation 1:
He didn’t build the site. It’s a template of some sort, and the site creators dreamed of populating it, and then they ran out of creative juju.
Explanation 2:
He posted in his journal, a lot. He started every morning alone with a cup of fresh squeezed orange juice, a wheat toast with some butter, a keyboard and his thoughts. Vin wrote and wrote, sometimes for 10 minutes, sometimes for two hours. The amount of time didn’t matter: what mattered was that he wrote every day. And then one day, he read The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald. Specifically, he came upon this passage:
“He smiled understandingly-much more than understandingly. It was one of those rare smiles with a quality of eternal reassurance in it, that you may come across four or five times in life. It faced–or seemed to face–the whole eternal world for an instant, and then concentrated on you with an irresistible prejudice in your favor. It understood you just as far as you wanted to be understood, believed in you as you would like to believe in yourself, and assured you that it had precisely the impression of you that, at your best, you hoped to convey.”
Vin Diesel was so struck by the eloquent prose, the story, and the greatest encapsulation what it is to love and die alone. He yelled, “THE GREAT AMERICAN NOVEL HAS ALREADY BEEN WRITTEN!” and slammed down on the delete key with Vin Diesel force, and his journal was no more.
It’s probably Explanation 2. That’s okay, it frees him to focus on his acting.
Leave a Comment