The other day I was walking home, and two fellas waved me over. “Excuse me!” they said. “Me?” I asked turning towards them.
“Yes, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a minute,” one began, taking a bite of the pizza he was having.
“Do you need something?” I inquired, as though I could give him directions if he needed them, or maybe a local restaurant recommendation, but that was probably the extent of my services.
He seemed a little taken aback by my tone, but not enough to derail him from Plan A. “I was wondering if you would like to sit here and hang out with us,” he said, motioning to the chair next to him. He wasn’t completely sober, and his friend looked bemused.
I was delighted.
“Ohhhhh! Thank you!” I said, smiling brightly. “I have to meet my husband for dinner, but that is so nice of you! I can’t wait to tell him I still got it!” And I shimmied a little.
I also motioned subtly to my ring, as if to say, “Dummy.”
“Don’t tell your husband,” he said, shaking his head.
“I absolutely have to tell him. THANK YOU!” and I turned and skipped away. What a pleasant surprise.
Oh Yeah, Still Got It
Published in Social Life
After a lifetime of not getting a lot of attention, it feels weird to reject people based on being married… It’s as if I’m a dish served to the buffet that has been sitting around untouched all through lunch, and now it’s 3pm and someone suddenly wants to eat me, but I’m reserved. I’m a bit stale, flattered, and I hope rejecting you doesn’t hurt your feelings, but I can’t tell you I wish you’d tried to claim me closer to noon because I’m happy now with who’s chosen me.