Month: October 2021

Two things happened since I last wrote:

1. I performed Live Sketch Comedy at a well-known venue.
2. My daughter pees on toilets now.
3. I guess also WordPress updated their templates? So the layout for writing posts is different. I know I said “Two things,” but while working on this post, it occurred to me that this specific third item was also remarkable and should be noted: software has changed.

The performance was great. Thrilling to be on stage, but also terrified of getting and spreading Covid, because we had to be unmasked to perform. But it has been over 10 days since the performance, and I think we are okay. The audience laughed, and perhaps most inspiring to me was our stand-up opener was not particularly good, and I thought, “HEY! I should get back into standup.”

The potty training was great too. And by great, I mean an interesting week.
Friday: Excited to wear big girl underwear. No interest in sitting on potty.
Saturday: Fine with wearing big girl underwear. Refusal to sit on toilet. Held pee until a bath Saturday night.
Sunday: Fine with wearing big girl underwear. Screams and tears around sitting on the toilet. “It’s scary!”

Monday night: All tears and screaming and her running to get a diaper, and me refusing to put it on her, and then her trying to put the diaper on herself, and then pee all over the floor and her crying, “LOOK AT THIS MESS! WE HAVE TO CLEAN IT UP!” all within one foot of the toilet. Three times. We were thinking we would get a note from the school saying we should take a break, but we are so grateful they kept up with her. Yesterday at home she told us when she had to pee and was happy to get on the toilet, and this morning too! 

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Dear Teacher,

Thank you for all you do! She might have mentioned recently that, “Mommy eats a lot of cookies.” I can explain. They were on sale, and they are chocolate chip.
Also I don’t let her eat any. I thought I was stealthily eating them in the corner, but I think she spotted me when she abruptly stopped playing with Legos and started doing laps around the kitchen counter.

Also she might have mentioned that “Daddy sleeps in the basement.” I can explain. We have ceded our marital bed to her. She sleeps sprawled in the middle, I sleep in the lower right corner, curled on the edge of the bed, and Daddy needs sleep, so he sleeps in the basement sometimes.

And maybe, it’s possible, she has shared that she gets a popsicle after school every day. This is also true. She takes them out of the box herself and presents each of us with one. They are low in sugar and calories, and we like them too. So here we are.

Have we lost control? I would offer that no, we have not technically _lost_ control, because we never really _had_ control.

Also I’m sorry this morning’s drop-off was chaotic. We’ll try harder.

Thank you again!
…

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